Monday, May 19, 2008

Cinema Verite

Change of pace. An im conversation with minimal editing.

TigrMchine: hi
G: Well hi, sweetie.
G: How are you?
G: I just made blondies :)
TigrMchine: I woke up sore; in fact, I was a little surprised I woke up sore, and spent most of the day helping my mother pull weeds and lay out tarp around the bushes
G: That was nice of you...I know the yard needed it.
G: So now you must be super sore, huh?
TigrMchine: well right now I dont feel particularly sore
TigrMchine: been thinking about yesterday: wrong, right, missed opportunities, what worked etc...
G: With regards to the matches?
TigrMchine: yes, and I think I've narrowed down what is bothering me about the intergender match
TigrMchine: Mariann, I don't think I deserved to beat her. I know that's ridiculous, treating something like this in terms of merit
G: Do you think that about...most of your opponents?
TigrMchine: but I'd feel better about it if I'd beaten a guy in addition to her...
TigrMchine: I think about their strategies and my reactions usually
G: Feel like you had "earned" that victory more?
TigrMchine: That girl was like me, she had to train like a madman, do all the extras, plus put up with whatever sexist notions she might have dealt with dealing with male athletes..
G: It was a fair fight and you won.
TigrMchine: I keep telling myself that but...
TigrMchine: thor's hammer, mjolnir (sp?)...
G: yeah
G: pronouned "molnir"
G: mole-near
TigrMchine: in the marvel universe, you have to be worthy to hold the hammer, even the hulk can't pick the damn thing up...
G: Hmm.
TigrMchine: I feel like I picked up the hammer but cheated, I found away around the rules, shit , not to extend the marvel metaphor to far but
TigrMchine: it's like I was holding the reality infinity gem and picking up the hammer
G: You are such a dork and I love it :)
TigrMchine: heh
G: What does the reality infinity gem do?
TigrMchine: hmm, depending on the sophisticaition of the user
TigrMchine: you're controlling the laws of physics, which in marvel, I think, would extend to the laws of magic
G: So you feel like you manipulated this victory somehow?
TigrMchine: not quite, I wasn't worthy yet, this is a gender thing I wasn't expecting to confront...
TigrMchine: I needed to beat another male before I earned the right to beat a woman
G: Interesting.
G: Well, you *almost* beat a male, and some dude who really outweighed you.
G: Are you going to be bothered about this until you win a "real" match?
TigrMchine: I don't know; it will ruminate for a while though
G: :nod:
TigrMchine: maybe, in the pools of my noggin, I think male=aggresor, female= victim
G: Gee.
TigrMchine: I'm not supposed to beat the victim
TigrMchine: I got into the martial arts because I watched you be victimized
TigrMchine: and being victimized myself
TigrMchine: through it
G: You were victimized, too, just through your own experiences.
TigrMchine: so although I think female equals victim, I identify with that position more than the male one? I dunno
G: Don't discount that.
TigrMchine: I don't mean to discount it.
G: By this logic, do you feel victimized again when you lose a match?
TigrMchine: well I've certainly felt grossly outmatched by a few of my teammates
G: :nod:
G: You should do na blo po mo next November.
TigrMchine: well I plan to compete in another tourney before then
G: Uh...
G: I would imagine so?
G: I just think you would enjoy the posting daily in November on your blog thing.
G: Two totally different subjects.
TigrMchine: eh?
TigrMchine: well what you said didn't make any sense on this screen lol
TigrMchine: "You should do na blo po mo next November."
G: http://nablopomo.ning.com/
G: I just thought with all the blogs you read you would have known what that meant.G: National Blog Posting Month
TigrMchine: why the hell does blog posting need a month? It doesn't even need a five minute time out
G: Well, why does national novel writing need a month...?
G: This is just the blog world's response to that event.
TigrMchine
: it doesn't, it's ubquitous, just like blogging
G: But...
G: Don't you think a particular time frame can give people focus and inspiration?
G: And support, if other people are doing it?
G: Well, if you don't like the idea, that's fine, David. I was simply making conversation.
TigrMchine: you mean like national eat a whole lot something something or national flush a toilet month?
TigrMchine: so am I
TigrMchine: I'm not accusing you of anything
TigrMchine: I just find the concept stupid
G: Apparently so.
G: Well then, don't participate.
G: I know B enjoyed writing during national novel writing month last November, but you aren't B.
TigrMchine: I won't :P If one is so lacking in inspiration that a month needs to be invented, then don't bother
TigrMchine: did she write a novel?
G: I think so. The thing I don't like about that event is that the word length isn't exactly ideal for publication.
TigrMchine: of course not because it's a poorly thought out concept :-P
G
: Ok.
G: How is the dog?
TigrMchine: on the clock
G: heh
G: dammit, "zax" should mean something cooler than "roofing hatchet"
G: Make up a definition for it.
G: Boo,
TigrMchine: don't like my def?
G: I like the use of it as a verb
TigrMchine: my mother is making the Krispie Kreme breadbudding
G: :)
TigrMchine: The vampire from the alternative universe was zaxed with the help of a spring chicken
TigrMchine: help
G: :smiles in spite of herself:
G: I wonder if you are subconciously invoking Zaxby's ;)
TigrMchine: not sub, quite aware
G: :p

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